Living for "Us"

Hey Refuge Church Family,

I wanted to take a moment to reflect on the teaching we heard this past Sunday from our guest speaker, Rick Marks.

Summary: The sermon explored the concept of "us-ness" in relationships, particularly in marriage but applicable to all relationships. Rick shared his personal journey of transformation and emphasized the importance of living for "us" rather than just for ourselves. He explained how this mindset reflects the Trinity and can resurrect dead relationships, leading to stronger connections and personal growth.

Takeaways:

• Every decision we make either gives to ourselves or to "us" (our relationship). Choosing to live for "us" requires humility but leads to stronger, healthier relationships.
• The concept of "us-ness" applies not just to marriage, but to all relationships - including those within our church community and with God.
• As Christians, we have a higher mandate to live for "us," modeling our relationships after how God treats us, with patience and kindness regardless of how we treat Him.

Rick's message was a powerful reminder of how we can transform our relationships by shifting our focus from "me" to "us." It challenges us to examine our own relationships and consider how we can better live out this principle in our daily lives.

Let's prayerfully consider how we can apply this message to strengthen our marriages, families, friendships, and our church community.

Blessings,
Pastor Stephen

Living for "Us" - Cultivating Unity in Relationships

Opening Question: Share a time when you felt a strong sense of unity or "us-ness" in a relationship (could be marriage, friendship, work team, etc.). What made that experience special?

Key Takeaways:

1. Every decision we make either gives to "me" or gives to "us" in our relationships.
2. It takes two to make an "us," but only one to kill it.
3. Pride undermines "us-ness," while humility cultivates it.
4. Living for "us" reflects the unity of the Trinity and is meant to be a powerful witness to the world.
5. When "us" is strong, individual needs are met more fully and securely.

Discussion Questions:

1. How does our culture's emphasis on individualism conflict with the biblical concept of "us-ness"?
2. The speaker said, "Christianity is not immunity from your humanity." How have you seen this play out in your own life or in the lives of others?
3. Discuss the statement: "You can love someone, but not know how to love." What are some ways we can learn to love better?
4. How might prioritizing "us" over "me" change the way you approach conflicts in your relationships?
5. The speaker mentioned that non-Christians can sometimes have better marriages than Christians. Why do you think this is, and what can we learn from it?
6. How does the concept of "us-ness" apply to the church as a whole? What are some ways we can cultivate greater unity within our congregation?

Practical Applications:

1. This week, before making decisions that affect your relationships, pause and ask yourself: "Am I giving to me or to us?"
2. Identify one area in a key relationship where you've been prioritizing "me" over "us." Make a specific plan to shift your focus to "us" in that area.
3. Practice humility by admitting a mistake or apologizing to someone you've hurt, even if it's uncomfortable.
4. If you're married, plan an activity that your spouse enjoys but you typically don't. Approach it with an "us" mindset.
5. For singles or those without a spouse, consider how you can apply the "us" principle to your friendships, family relationships, or church community.

Closing Prayer: Father, thank you for modeling perfect unity within the Trinity. Help us to reflect that unity in our relationships. Give us the humility and strength to prioritize "us" over "me," even when it's difficult. May our unity be a powerful witness to the world of Your love. In Jesus' name, Amen.