SENT HOME: Shaping Souls: The Sacred Responsibility of Pointing Children to Jesus

There is a particular weight that comes with raising children. It is more than sleepless nights, busy schedules, or the daily challenges of parenting. It is the responsibility of knowing that a soul is watching you, learning from you, and being shaped by what you do and say. Psalm 78 reminds us that our responsibility is not to be perfect parents, but to tell the coming generation about the glorious deeds of the Lord—His strength, His power, and the wonders He has done. We are called to share His faithfulness, recount His provision, and make sure our children know who God is and what He has done. The goal is that they will place their hope in God and, in turn, pass that faith on to the generations that follow.

But Psalm 78 also reveals an uncomfortable truth: God's people were prone to forgetting. They witnessed miracles, experienced His provision, and saw His power, yet they repeatedly turned away and doubted Him. Still, God continued to show mercy and faithfulness. Their story is a reflection of our own. We often remember our struggles more easily than God's goodness. That is why we must intentionally build practices of remembering in our homes. Share stories of God's faithfulness, express gratitude, and talk about His goodness around the dinner table. Our children need to see that remembering God is not simply something we talk about on Sundays, but something that shapes our everyday lives.

And here is what parents need to remember: the goal is not perfection. Our children do not need parents who never fail; they need parents who know how to return to grace. When we make mistakes, we have the opportunity to say, "I was wrong. I'm sorry. I should have handled that differently." These moments teach our children the reality of the gospel. They help them understand that we are all sinners in need of God's grace and that Jesus came to bridge the gap between us and God through His death and resurrection. As our children grow, they need to understand both the seriousness of sin and the incredible depth of God's mercy. Together, these truths tell the greatest story ever told.

Psalm 78 ends with David, a shepherd-king chosen to lead God's people. Yet even David could not ultimately save them. He was pointing toward someone greater: Jesus, the Good Shepherd who lays down His life for His sheep (John 10:11). The same is true of every parent, mentor, and faithful adult in a child's life. We cannot save our children; they belong to God. Our responsibility is to shape and influence them in ways that point them toward Jesus—in our faithfulness, our failures, and the ordinary moments of everyday life. Before we can point our children to the Good Shepherd, we must know Him ourselves. And perhaps the most powerful way we can lead them to Jesus is by letting them see Him shaping our own lives.

TRANSFORMATION GROUP GUIDE
"Sent Home: Shaping the Next Generation" | Psalm 78

KEY TAKEAWAYS
(Use these points as a reference throughout your discussion.)

• Our children do not belong to us. They belong to God. Yet it is our God-given responsibility to shape or influence them in such a way that they see Jesus as worth following.
• We shape our children not only in our successes and faithfulness, but also in our failures and how we return to the grace of God.
• Psalm 78 reveals a recurring pattern: God is faithful and miraculous, his people forget and rebel, and God remains compassionate and merciful anyway. This mirrors our own experience as parents and as people.
• Pointing children to Jesus begins with knowing Jesus personally. Before we can shepherd others toward the Good Shepherd, we must be following him ourselves.
• God is the one who saves. Our role is to point, not to rescue.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
Work through as many of these as time allows. Do not feel pressure to cover every question.

On the Responsibility to Tell
In Psalm 78:4, the psalmist writes that we are not to hide the glorious deeds of the Lord from the next generation, but to tell them. 

• What are some practical ways you are currently telling the children in your life about what God has done? 
• Where do you feel like you are falling short?

Pastor Josh described the difference between hearing something and experiencing it, using the example of coffee. 

• How has your own personal experience of God's faithfulness made it easier or harder to share that with others, including children?

Pastor Josh suggested to start by simply repeating to your children, "There is nothing you can do to make Jesus love you more or less than he already does, and he loves you more than I do." 

• How does that kind of repetition shape a child's understanding of the gospel over time?

On the Pattern of Forgetting
Psalm 78 shows Israel repeatedly forgetting what God had done for them, even in the middle of miraculous provision. 

• Where in your own life do you find yourself most prone to forgetting God's faithfulness?

Pastor Josh asked whether you have ever made a list of what God has done for you, or taken a gratitude walk. 

• Have you ever done something like that? 
• What effect did it have? 
• If you have not, what is holding you back?
• How can we as a small group help one another remember what God has done, so that forgetting becomes less of a default?

On Parenting Imperfection
Pastor Josh said, "Jesus will be worth following to your children when they see your humanity and see you return to the grace of God again and again and again." 

• Do you find it easy or difficult to be honest with your children about your own failures and need for grace? Why?

In the sermon, Pastor Josh pointed out that parents can be tempted either to boast in their godliness or to wallow in their failures, and that both can cause harm. 

• Which tendency do you lean toward, and how does the gospel correct both?

Pastor Josh shared that both of his children came to faith not during picture-perfect family moments, but during hard, messy seasons of life. 

• How does that reframe your expectations about how God might work in the lives of the children around you?

On the Good Shepherd
In John 10:11 and 14, Jesus describes himself as the Good Shepherd who knows his sheep and lays down his life for them. 

• How does understanding Jesus as the Good Shepherd change the way you think about your role as a parent, mentor, or influence in a child's life?

Pastor Josh closed with the question: Does Jesus shape your life more than anything else? 

• Sit with that question for a moment before answering. What does an honest answer look like for you right now?

PRACTICAL APPLICATION

Choose one or two of these to commit to before your group meets again:

• Read and write out Psalm 78. Take time this week to copy the passage by hand, verse by verse. Note what stands out to you about God's character and Israel's pattern of forgetting.
• Make a list of what God has done. Set aside 15 to 20 minutes to write down specific ways God has been faithful in your life. Consider sharing this list with your children or someone close to you.
• Have a conversation you have been avoiding. If the sermon stirred conviction about a relationship with a child, spouse, or family member, take a step toward that conversation this week. Begin with an apology if one is needed.
• Start a simple gospel habit at home. Begin repeating a simple gospel truth to the children in your life on a regular basis. It does not need to be elaborate. Consistency matters more than complexity.
• Attend Refuge church's prayer gathering. Bring your real requests and your real needs.
• Introduce yourself to a family with young children. Take the initiative to engage with one of the families with young children and begin building a relationship. The community's role in raising children is not passive.

PRAY FOR...

• The children represented in your group, by name if possible
• Parents who are carrying guilt or discouragement
• Those in the group who are still working through what it means for Jesus to be their Good Shepherd
• The next generation in your church and community

A NOTE TO GROUP LEADERS

This sermon touches on topics that may surface real pain for some group members, including estrangement from children, grief over prodigal kids, infertility, regret over past parenting, or a difficult relationship with their own parents.

Create space for honesty without forcing it. Remind the group that the sermon's central message is not about perfect parenting but about a perfectly faithful God who meets us in our imperfection.